Ambrose Bierce Quotes About Politics
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PICKANINNY, n. The young of the "Procyanthropos", or "Americanus dominans". It is small, black and charged with political fatalities.
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Battle, n., A method of untying with the teeth a political knot that would not yield to the tongue.
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TENACITY, n. A certain quality of the human hand in its relation to the coin of the realm. It attains its highest development in the hand of authority and is considered a serviceable equipment for a career in politics.
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Consul - in American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is given one by the Administration on condition that he leave the country.
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SORCERY, n. The ancient prototype and forerunner of political influence. It was, however, deemed less respectable and sometimes was punished by torture and death.
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Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
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Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.
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What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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Boundary, n. In political geography, an imaginary line between two nations, separating the imaginary rights of one from the imaginary rights of another.
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I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are Democrats.
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ADMINISTRATION, n. An ingenious abstraction in politics, designed to receive the kicks and cuffs due to the premier or president. A man of straw, proof against bad-egging and dead-catting.
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NOMINATE, v. To designate for the heaviest political assessment. To put forward a suitable person to incur the mudgobbling and deadcatting of the opposition.
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ARENA, n. In politics, an imaginary rat-pit in which the statesman wrestles with his record.
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Alliance - in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.
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PANDEMONIUM, n. Literally, the Place of All the Demons. Most of them have escaped into politics and finance, and the place is now used as a lecture hall by the Audible Reformer.
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Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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PRESIDENCY, n. The greased pig in the field game of American politics.
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RECOUNT, n. In American politics, another throw of the dice, accorded to the player against whom they are loaded.
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DELEGATION, n. In American politics, an article of merchandise that comes in sets.
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