Funny Divorce Quotes
The best sayings about Funny Divorce that you can share on Instagram, Pinterest, Facebook and other social networks!
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In our family we don't divorce our men - we bury them.
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The worst reconciliation is better than the best divorce.
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Nowadays love is a matter of chance, matrimony a matter of money and divorce a matter of course.
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Alimony - the ransom that the happy pay to the devil.
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I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always
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If you made a list of reasons why any couple got married, and another list of the reasons for their divorce, you'd have a hell of a lot of overlapping.
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There are four stages to marriage. First there's the affair, then there's the marriage, then children, and finally the fourth stage, without which you cannot know a woman, the divorce.
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Half of all marriages end in divorce- and then there are the really unhappy ones.
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I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
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To get over my divorce, I got a prescription to live at the Playboy Mansion for a while.
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My husband taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house.
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For a while we pondered whether to take a vacation or get a divorce. We decided that a trip to Bermuda is over in two weeks, but a divorce is something you always have.
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Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
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I can't take his genius any more.
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The only solid and lasting peace between a man and his wife is, doubtless, a separation.
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Divorce is the psychological equivalent of a triple coronary bypass.
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Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over a bad marriage than you ever can from a good divorce.
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My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.
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You know, Elizabeth Taylor must be in Heaven going, 'Alright, fire two honey!'
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The happiest time of anyone's life is just after the first divorce.
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Divorce is probably of nearly the same date as marriage. I believe, however, that marriage is some weeks the more ancient.
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A lot of people have asked me how short I am. Since my last divorce, I think I'm about $100,000 short.
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American husbands are the best in the world; no other husbands are so generous to their wives, or can be so easily divorced.
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Divorce sucks. Let me tell you, after five years of marriage, it is devastating to have the person with the good credit move out.
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Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.
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My mother always said don't marry for money, divorce for money.
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In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage.
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A divorce lawyer is a chameleon with a law book.
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A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.
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Marriage is probably the chief cause of divorce.
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