Karl Pilkington Quotes
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It's like the panda, they say that's dying out. But what do they do? When you see them they're just sitting in the jungle eating.
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Neil Armstrong, that spaceman, he went to the moon but he ain't been back. It can't have been that good.
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We're just a weed in the universe
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By 78 you've done everything you're going to do. If you haven't bungee-jumped by the time you're 78 you're not going to do it.
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I'm not invited to any exciting parties and my life hasn't really changed.
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I'm not that lazy, but I don't need that much money. I lead a fairly simple life.
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I saw a bee have a heart attack.
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Blind people can stay up longer than someone with eyes.
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Be the ugly one, look at the nice one.
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I sometimes wonder how we're short of cod. There's gonna be a load deep down that are hiding. But it's a good reason to put the price up, and it means a load of people will have haddock. They should tell people they're running out of all sorts. Make 'em panic a bit.
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The reason there are so many gyms in London is because the amount of gay people who are here now.
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If you can't do it, don't do it.
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If you don't sleep you get run down. Sloths never get a flu, cos its good innit thats when your body's replemishing.
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The Web is the new book though, innit?
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Stop looking at the walls, look out the window.
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I'd rather live in a cave with a view of a palace than live in a palace with a view of a cave.
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Sometimes you can know too much. A lot of brainy people like Stephen Fry are quite depressive.
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I told her that I can't be doing with the Wonder part of these trips, but she said it should be the icing on the cake... I've never liked wedding cake due to the amount of icing, but then imagine a wedding cake without it; just a dark, stodgy, horrible dry sponge. The icing covers up the mess, and that's how I feel about most of the Wonders. They use them to get people to visit a place that you probably wouldn't think about visiting.
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We came from the sea originally, now we're going back in it. Don't go in it, unless you're in a boat.
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With identical twins, you always get a little snidey one.
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To me, a cat is an easy pet, they don't need any spoiling or looking after.
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I've got loads of nieces and nephews.
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We are always making more and more stuff in the world. You know; big buildings, big planes, big boats and that. Will we ever get to a point where all this is too heavy for the world to handle?
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I mean, I am into nature and seeing whales. I went whale-watching, and I was really looking forward to that, but when you see it on TV and you see other programs do it, you're seeing close-ups of these massive creatures, and the music that's added gives you a certain feeling.
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it annoys me a bit how people like squirrels but not rats. at the end of the day they're the same thing, except that squirrels have had a better upbringing.
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What happens if someone else has my eyes, and they start looking at stuff I don't like? I don't like the idea of that.
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Treat the world like a head.
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I'm just sayin', I don't like fun.
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I've never won many awards, I didn't get certificates for swimming or anything.
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It's not a joke: I really do like being at home.
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