Ellen DeGeneres Quotes About Hilarious
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Just go up to somebody on the street and say 'You're it!' and then run away.
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Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer.
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Do we have to know who's gay and who's straight? Can't we just love everybody and judge them by the car they drive?
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Now airlines charge for everything... If the oxygen mask drops, you have to swipe your credit card to start the flow of the oxygen.
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I was raised around heterosexuals, as all heterosexuals are. That's where us gay people come from - you heterosexuals.
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My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.
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I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that.
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People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.
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