Don Herold Quotes
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Golf is not sacred, and there is no use getting so gosh-darned solemn about it.
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I had, out of my sixty teachers, a scant half dozen who couldn't have been supplanted by phonographs.
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Women give us solace, but if it were not for women we should never need solace.
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If I had my life to live over, I would try to make more mistakes. I would relax. I would be sillier than I have been this trip. I know of very few things that I would take seriously. I would be less hygienic. I would go more places. I would climb more mountains and swim more rivers. I would eat more ice cream and less spinach. I would have more actual troubles and fewer imaginary troubles.
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Golf may be a hussy, but I love her.
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Comic-strip artists do not make good husbands, and God knows they do not make good comic strips.
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The mind of man has no defense To equal plain, old common sense. This homely virtue don't despise, If you would be happy as well as wise.
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Poverty must have many satisfactions, else there would not be so many poor people.
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An honourable agreement among men as to their conduct toward women, and it was devised by women.
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I do not believe in doing for pleasure things I do not like to do.
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Nobody ever looked up and saw a good shot.
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If I had my life to live over, I'd pick more daisies.
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The brighter you are, the more you have to learn.
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Some people have nothing but experience.
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Babies are a great way to start people.
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It is a good thing that life is not as serious as it seems to a waiter.
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A lot of men think that if they smile for a second, somebody will take advantage of them, and they are right.
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Moralizing and morals are two entirely different things and are always found in entirely different people
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Methods of locomotion have improved greatly in recent years, but places to go remain about the same.
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This is the greatest paradox: the emotions cannot be trusted; yet it is the emotions that tell us the greatest truths.
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Intellectuals should never marry; they won't enjoy it; and besides, they should not reproduce themselves.
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A woman's hair net tangled in a man's spectacles on top of the bedroom dresser.
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There's one thing about baldness, it's neat.
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If I had my life to live over, I would perhaps have more actual troubles but I'd have fewer imaginary ones.
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It takes a lot of things to prove you are smart, but only one thing to prove you are ignorant.
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In all systems of theology, the devil figures as a male person.
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Very few people look the part and are it too.
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There is more sophistication and less sense in New York than anywhere else on the globe.
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A humorist is a person who feels bad, but who feels good about it.
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About the time we get old enough to be as wicked as we want to be, we don't want to be so very wicked after all.
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