• The reason I'm not an alcoholic is I don't like to drink in front of the kids . . . and when you're away from them, who needs it?.

    Phyllis Diller: The reason I'm not an alcoholic is I don't like to drink in front of the kids . . . and when you're away from them, who needs it?.
    Phyllis Diller (2006). “Like a Lampshade in a Whorehouse: My Life in Comedy”, p.194, Penguin