Melvin Helitzer Quotes

• Enjoy how sweet, how thoughtful, how kind I'm being on your birthday. Because tomorrow it's back to the same old crap.

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  Melvin Helitzer

  Sweet   Thoughtful   Tomorrow  

  1788

• I sort of feel like Cindy Crawford's new husband on their wedding night. I know what's expected of me. I'm just not sure I've got the ability to make it interesting.

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  Melvin Helitzer

  Husband   Night   Interesting  

  1839

• One thing I can guarantee you. You may not be a great deal wiser from my talk today, but you will be a great deal older.

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  Melvin Helitzer

  Guarantees   May   Today  

  Melvin Helitzer (1992). “The Dream Job: Sports Publicity, Promotion, and Public Relations”, Univ Sports Press

  3511

• If the audience knows what's behind the door and the actor does not, that's comedy. If both the audience and the actor do not know, that's mystery!

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  Melvin Helitzer

  Doors   Doe   Actors  

  2310

• I'd like to introduce a man with a lot of charm, talent, and wit. Unfortunately, he couldn't be here tonight, so instead . . .

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  Melvin Helitzer

  Men   Tonight   Talent  

  Melvin Helitzer (1992). “Comedy Writing Secrets”, Writers Digest Books

  3187

• I have a serious investment problem. I have no money.

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  Melvin Helitzer

  Serious   Problem   Investment  

  Melvin Helitzer (1992). “Comedy Writing Secrets”, Writers Digest Books

  1812

• A famous actor, Edmund Kean, on his deathbed, was reported to have said, "Dying is easy. Comedy is hard."

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  Melvin Helitzer

  Dying   Actors   Comedy  

  Melvin Helitzer (1992). “Comedy Writing Secrets”, Writers Digest Books

  3495

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